muse_cafe September Specials (multiple)
(for muse_cafe)


Well, damn it, damn it, damn it.

Why. Why is it always a GODDAMNED STRUGGLE to get even the simplest tiny things that might make me smile?

I went to the store to get some Cherry Coke. See? Simple. Only of course it wasn't. All they had was that black cherry vanilla crap with its distinctive tang of vomit. Don't even start about Wild Cherry Pepsi.

And the fucking clerk laughed of course. "You can just settle for what we have or go somewhere else."

He said that. He actually said that. Do I have a damned POST-IT ON MY FOREHEAD saying "Show this person no respect, common courtesy, or human dignity"? IS THERE??!?!?!?!?!?!?!? I asked him that and all he did was whimper like a kicked puppy (Note: I do not kick puppies, unless they are the little yappy kind, in which case it is a public service).

So once I wiped off the worst of the blood, I went next door to the establishment certain wit-impaired cretins refer to "humorously" as Starfucks. It was, of course, jammed with techno-yuppies with cellphones permanently attatched to their ears (Note to self: this would be amusing if it were literal. Acquire materials. Soldering iron?) drinking septuple espressos like caffienated wasps and slackers making one cup of that chai shit last all afternoon while they snicker over The Onion or pretend to be hip with their nose stuck in the "alternative" newspaper.

And actually, I didn't have myself a little fun there. I'm saving it for later. It'll be a special treat.

So of course they give me that look when I ask for steamed milk with a shot of cherry syurp. FUCK! Can't I do anything in peace?

Stuff tasted like baby puke anyway. Damn it.